Skip to main content

White man got me down.

Only a few months after declaring myself happy, I'm sorry to admit that the white man has officially got me down.  I haven't written in a while because I don't want to go full negativity on y'all.  I'm exasperated by the current state of America, my job and and my bitch ass neighbors and before you go calling me a racist, let's look at the tail of the tape:


The President is a fucking moron, as described by the Secretary of State.  You read that correctly.  But, that isn't news.  45 was a lying moron his entire campaign, yet this country STILL ELECTED HIM PRESIDENT!  Which leads me to one hard conclusion:  No matter how hard I will ever work, people will still value white maleness over anything else in this country.  That's fucking depressing.  It's also quite tiresome because I don't just get to watch it on news feeds 24 hours a day, i get to watch in real life.  Let's talk about my job.

The Gig:

I don't have a terrible job.  Oh, I'm underemployed as shit but it is something that I could do with my eyes closed.  I literally put more thought in to the songs to play on spotify than the actual work.  If I wasn't a proud blerd (black nerd) that wouldn't be a problem but still, I find shit to read all day so I haven't gone plum loco quite yet.  Here's the problem.  They started a new crew of perfectly shmegular white guys working and started them at the same salary it took me 2.5 years to earn.  That's unfair from jump but it gets worse, they don't get asked to do half the shit I did to get where I am, yet they keep getting rewarded.  One of the guys with nary a year under his belt was just promoted to run a warehouse out of state where he is on salary and works 4 days a week, which is really 3 and a half days.  I know this because I, unlike him, have actually trained to do the damned job.  Don't get me wrong, I don't want to move to the other warehouse.  I have a family and shit.  My point is that they clearly value him more as an employee (pay bump) because what?  Education, nope.  Work ethic, nope.  He was terrible at the job he had before he was promoted.  So with no experience, education or know how he's making more money than me and by all accounts sucks at his new job.  Let's just say it's stuck in my craw.  I should get over it.  I should worry about my own money.  I haven't figured out how yet.

Along the same lines, there are men here that think their entire job is to walk around brown nosing.  Let's call it what it is.  I wouldn't get annoyed if that shit wasn't getting them paid.  These motherfuckers are getting overtime every week and are hardly missed during the day because no one expects them to be useful.  They are just here getting paid to be white men.  Because America.  now, more closer to home...

The Shit Heels:

I may be forced to murder my neighbors.  As the only white family on the block (grandfather, his son, and grandson) they are the bane of the entire area and expect to get away with it because apparently people have let them for a decade.  These idiots have a race car in their driveway that they just turn on, just to see if it's running.  The shit shakes my whole house and when I called the police, they never showed up.  Ever.  That is actually the 2nd time we've had to call popo on their asses.  The first time, middle shit heel beat the shit out of older shit heel and he came his shit heel ass over to my house to use the phone to call the police.  Middle shit heel fled the scene and moved back in 2 weeks later and was subsequently arrested for trying to steal from UHaul.  A year later he gets out of jail and moves right back in to older shit heel's house, because white man. It was quiet for a year and then... He beat the shit out of his girlfriend in the street in front of my house.  Surely the police would respond, yes? Sort of.  They showed up 45 minutes after I called them and knocked on who's door?  My door.  Didn't even talk to them.  So next time I'm just gonna have to take matters in my own hands.  Beat him with a hammer and go to jail for assault at best, at worst I'll just be a hashtag because obviously #WomanBeaterLivesMatter.  The cops will probably see me beating some white man and decide to shoot me.

Basically I'm saying whether I'm at work, watching the news or at home, I'm putting up with this shit.  Thankfully, white women invade my dreams to help redeem the race. (Thanks Tapenga, you the real MVP)

I already know what you're thinking: Cogito, you're just a racist.  But, to the contrary.  There are personable, hardworking white men that I not only fucks with, I actually like them whether it be at my job (several), on my block (ok, one around the corner), or in Washington D.C (Shout out to Bernie Sanders). The problem is that it's not a fucking coincidence that all of the horrible people and coworkers I know are white men.

Is it a coincidence that 70% of fortune 500 CEOs are White men?  It is a coincidence that 80% of congress are White men?  Think real hard about your bosses, or even the word boss.  What do you envision?

How do you explain this?  You have three real options:
1) You think it's a coincidence (Which makes you an idiot)
2) You think think that White men are just better at everything (which makes you racist and probably sexist)
3) This some bullshit (You win)
4) Fool, it ain't no '4', I said THREE. Pick one! (fool!)

It's just so exasperating... But we gotta do something.  Me?  It appears I'm headed to jail and joblessness for my inability to cooperate.  You can pay the bills with standards, right?

What can you do?  To be honest, I just can't call it.  Don't be like me.  Don't lose your job (slightly worried this is the post that gets me fired).  Don't hurt a stranger that doesn't deserve it, or one that does deserve it but the consequences of justice are too high.

If you happen to be a White man, fortunate enough to win the racism lottery, what can you do?  I actually have an answer.  Be honest. I'm not saying don't take the advantages given to you but don't pass them down.  I know it's hard not to think other White dudes should get treated as well as you have been but think about it this way:  Can we do better?  Isn't doing better what the human race is all about?  I have an answer with a question.  Do you use a blackberry?  A blackberry used to be better.  Stop being a blackberry.

Surely, this has been exhausting to read and I apologize but I am exhausted too.  But hey, gold star for finishing (Hi, Big sister!) and there were a lot of parenthetical asides. Shout out to Ms. Stock, Ms. Willis and Ms. Hams (where they married?) and Prof. Delilah Caldwell.

What I was trying to say is "The White Man" isn't a joke. It is a pattern and we all see it and it's time for the shit to stop.

Popular posts from this blog

For my friends that considered suicide when having a nigga in your corner isn't enough

I remember wanting to die.  I didn't want to kill myself per se, I just wished that I could just go the fuck away.  I was a young, skinny teenager that wasn't looking forward to anything outside of video games.  What kind of life is that?

But teenage life is always stupid.  When the lead actor is phoning it in, the play sucks.  That is teenage life in America.  I wish I could say that only teenagers go dark enough to want to die but we all know that is not true.  Life gets so much harder for people that dare to be an adult.

As an adult, I get reminded of my younger years because shit still gets dark.  When I feel that kind of hopelessness, I still remember the fire that gets lit inside of me.  My ability to say "Fuck all of these people." is my super power.  It is a necessary tool for me.  When all the love I try to spread around begins to fail that flaming hatred for those that I let push me there always comes back.  Somehow, it brings the rest of me with it.


Kinda on the Wagon

If you guys know me, you know that I love the sauce.  The potion has been my greatest unwinding mechanism for sixteen plus years now.  With that being said, I come to you with a heavy heart because I have to inform you that I've nearly stopped drinking.

I didn't do this for any of the normal reasons niggas get on the wagon.  It wasn't for the kids or because I love my liver (sorry liver) but I did it for the same reason I keep finding myself buying maxi pads; to shut my wife up.

Now, with quiet wife, I've made few reflections on this journey:

1)  This is stupid but necessary, yet, also stupid.  You know what's better after a few drinks?  Everything.  Well, maybe not everything.  Drinking and basketball are uneasy bedfellows but you get the point.  When you do these things while dead sober, it turns out they are a little bit harder to enjoy.  For some reason I have walked in to a room that was clearly labeled "not as fun as the room next door" and I'm …

What the Fuck, People?

I used to write about politics a lot.  I had to make the conscious decision to stop because it was just so negative.  We are talking six or seven years ago when congress was just regular useless.  I thought it was bad then nut noooooooo.  It turns out that the shit just started storming.

How did we get here?  Donald Fucking Trump went from firing Gary Busey to picking 2 Supreme Court Justices.  That's completely ridiculous, yet, here we are.

V for Vendetta is one of my favorite movies and in one of the opening scenes he railed the entire nation of England for shutting the fuck up while things went completely to shit.  Even though I've watched that part 100 times, here I sat, watching the world burn.

This is how it happens.  The indifference of good men and all that shit.

It's so seductive.  Just keep your head down and keep plugging away.  Then you look up one day and the government is kidnapping children.  Then you log on to twitter and Stacey Dash is defending that shit.…