Cogito Ergo

I try to enjoy life.  I like loud music, Victoria's secret commercials and hard liquor.  The inverse of that is that I hate watered down shit like light beer, soft-core porn and pulling out. That last one has gotten me in trouble again. That's right.  Me and Mrs. Cogito are expecting another surprise, i mean baby... I mean surprise baby. Having a second baby isn't as stressful as the first.  I know how to budget for beer and video games and the like so that won't keep me up at night but baby number does represent some new challenges.  Here are a few: Regular sex life is dead The pregnant wife keeps calling herself fat which means low self esteem which means not feeling frisky which means my relationship with internet porn is about to flourish.  None of these things are healthy.  Maybe I should just hit the strip club on a regular basis.  Nahhh, too expensive. I need a new car I drive a two door and I have the front seat as far back as it can go.  Can't