Cogito Ergo

I know that most you have no idea what Kwanzaa is so let me say this...   Do I look like fucking Google to you?   Google that shit and come back.   I’ll wait… Now that that’s done, I know a lot of you still don’t see why you should interrupt your binge drinking this week to celebrate this relatively new holiday.   Welp, I have come up with a few reasons that we should all dawn our dashikis and get our harambee on.   And yes, my non-black friends, this concerns you as well.   Black people, niggas haven’t ruined this yet.   This isn’t like the first week of the showing for Django.   Getting on to Kwanzaa now is like going to see 12 years a slave in the suburbs 4 months after release.   It might be some hip White folks there and perhaps some interracial couples but dumb niggas just ain’t coming.   Trust me; we lost most of the dumb niggas when I asked them to Google something that lead them to pages with very few booties and a...

Deadbeat dads out there, I understand.   Having a baby is some scary shit.   Also there’s the financial cost and the fact that you will be tied to the child’s mother for at least 18 years.   That can be some creepy shit if you hardly know that woman and you’re broke already. Here’s the problem.   Having sex, especially unprotected sex, is some grown up shit.   If you are man enough to do grown-up shit then you should be grown up enough to face the consequences.   For example:   I drive a car pretty much every damned day.   I do this with the knowledge that driving a car is probably the most dangerous thing I can do with my time.   It is far more likely to kill me than anything I do but I take responsibility and try to drive as safely as possible.   I don’t mean to scare people; in fact, I aim to do the opposite.   I am saying that you face the risks of an adult life, get in your car and get to it.   Why?   Becaus...

I tend to have a critical eye.   I like making little observations about people and places but there is one group of people that always confuses me.   The young black generation sometimes bothers me with their styles, their music and their acceptance of Chris Brown makes me ask “What the hell is wrong with these niggas?” In my ongoing exploration of the issue, I’ve come up with only a few things.   1:   The struggle has been lost If you ask kids today what blackness is, they’d say crazy things like “We don’t have to pull our pants up” or, “We make all the good twerk videos.”   This is what happens when you let Disney and Viacom define culture.   Minority cultures get completely ignored and children are left to come up with their own answers.   Children, being children, always find the dumbest answers.   Most of it is my generation’s fault.   We didn’t really hold the mantle of responsibility very well.   We didn’t produce 2c...

I really like zombie movies.   I will basically watch anything with a title that ends in “of the dead”.   There is something about the idea of a few survivors, or even a lone hero, going against all odds to escape hordes of mindless beasts.   I was reminded of how much I identify with the protagonists in zombie movies today when I went to church.   For those of you that don’t know me, I’m not really big on church.   Not only does it happen during NFL games and NBA Sunday, it really is boring to me.   I went to church a little bit when I was a kid and I actually remember a lot of the lessons.   The result is that I tend to tune out anything I find redundant and start to analyze the environment and people around me. Now, that didn’t happen today.   Today I got pissed off too quickly to bother myself with trying to figure out who was full of shit and who was just stupid. Church is an odd place to find yourself wanting to smack the shit o...

It used to be a big fear of mine that I would reach my (gulp) mid-thirties and not have any of my dreams come true.   Now, at 33, I can honestly say that nightmare has all but come true but you know what, it ain’t so bad and here’s why. 1.)       I’m still pretty hot.   I know that’s pretty vain to say but I feel better about my looks and body now than I ever have.   Sure, there are moles and scratches and dents that I don’t even know where they came from but the overall package is still holding up pretty nice.   It could be that I’ve just learned to accept what I got and run with it but as long as it looks good to me, whats really the difference? 2.) I have a beautiful family: Now, that being said, everyone with a spouse and a kid feels like running away to Brazil, never to be seen again.   But most of us don’t do that; mainly because families are pretty awesome when they...

So I have a couple of recurring dreams.   The first one is fairly harmless.   I get it when I clench my teeth at night.   Consequently, I dream that all my teeth are falling out.   I’ve had it so many times that I often realize that I’m dreaming within the dream.   I never do anything cool once I realize that I’m dreaming.   Naked Halle and naked Mariah never show up and seduce me or something cool like that.   I just sort of gum around and spit blood until the ride is over. Now, there’s another dream that I keep having that is even worse than the feeling of having to spit all my teeth into the sink.   I keep having this dream where I fuck up… really, REALLY fuck up.   You see, I keep having this dream where I commit murder.   Funny enough, the actual murder is never anything special.   Half the time, I pop in to the dream and the murder is already over.   I get in to the dream at the really bad part.   I’m either r...

The big news this week is the Australian baseball player that was killed by three teenaged boys that were bored and decided that throwing their lives away would be a good way to get the ole heart rate up.   I have some real problems with the way this story is getting covered in the news.   But, before I get to that, I was pretty shocked that they actually succeeded.   People that fucking dumb don’t usually accomplish a goal, no matter how nefarious.   I mean, seriously, one of them posted online that it was time to take some “life’s”.   Not only does he not know the plural of “life”, what the fuck was the apostrophe for? Anyway, this isn’t a blog about dumb ass teenagers, this is about the media.   So, let’s dive in. First off, since when is it okay to show the pictures and names of minors on the internet and on TV?   I know the justice system likes to arbitrarily decide when they will or will not charge someone as a minor but here in the rea...