Cogito Ergo

I have two daughters and a wife and them niggas keep on eating.  Like, every day more food. My wife works but in 2017 it ain't gonna be enough money to keep everyone in food, clothing and shelter if we have another baby.  We are on some Cold Equation  shit.  If we have another baby, one of us is going out the airlock and since that's probably gonna be me, it was time for the big snip. The very idea of a vasectomy is conflicting.  There's the comfort of not having another baby and the disappointment of not being able to have another baby.   I love babies.  I have become one of those dads that will hold your baby and give them goo goo eyes.  Back when i was a young man, I wouldn't go near them.  Until they could walk and maybe take a 3 foot drop like a champ, I wouldn't touch them.  Now, I live off baby smiles.  Partly because my family eats all the damned food, but I digress.  I really wouldn't mind having ...

I try to enjoy life.  I like loud music, Victoria's secret commercials and hard liquor.  The inverse of that is that I hate watered down shit like light beer, soft-core porn and pulling out. That last one has gotten me in trouble again. That's right.  Me and Mrs. Cogito are expecting another surprise, i mean baby... I mean surprise baby. Having a second baby isn't as stressful as the first.  I know how to budget for beer and video games and the like so that won't keep me up at night but baby number does represent some new challenges.  Here are a few: Regular sex life is dead The pregnant wife keeps calling herself fat which means low self esteem which means not feeling frisky which means my relationship with internet porn is about to flourish.  None of these things are healthy.  Maybe I should just hit the strip club on a regular basis.  Nahhh, too expensive. I need a new car I drive a two door and I have the front seat as far back a...